The Juvenile Dead

There I was, trying to be a better friend and a loving son,
But I stumbled on my way and fell deep into oblivion;
Everywhere I looked there was darkness surrounding me,
I made to the door but I didn't have the key.
I held my hand up in the air,
Hoping that someone would hold them and make this life worth living;
But it never happened,
There were no hands to hold on to in this world so unforgiving.
Maybe I should have said the words left un said,
Maybe I should not have stopped the tears that never flowed,
Maybe I could have been a little more caring,
Maybe that's why I was never loved.
Why couldn't anyone understand me,Why was there a mask on my feelings,
Why did I laugh away my tears,
Why didn't I accept the truth and not think I'm dreaming.
That day when the boy inside me was crying uncontrollably,
When everyone I knew was trying to pin me down;
Why didn't they comfort me instead,
Why did I have to be a juvenile dead.

Vinod Iyer